Did God answer Mojo’s prayer?
Last week, after talking about Kathy Griffin, Mojo asked God or whomever, if they exist to end the war in Iraq by this week’s show to prove their existence.

Technically God has till the end of the show to prove himself since he made the proclamation at the end of the show.

This week’s show is all about God and religion. Let’s open the phones now. Does God exist?

I grew up in the deep south in a small town. A religious family. At 12 I had to mow the grass and go to church to eat based on my dad’s rules. Back then I was skeptical. I want to believe in the good and the kindness of people, but it just isn’t there.

Should we have god in government, in schools, in court, on our money?
Is god on our side in Iraq?

Doesn’t the enemy think God’s on their side. Isn’t Mohammed and God the same thing? Is religion good or bad? There are people all over doing good in the name of religion. But there’s also a lot of lying and cheating and killing.

If god is so good, why are there so many sects. Just in Christianity there’s a whole page in the newspaper for churches in your town.

Pope Benedict (hope he didn’t break it) [also the Nazi pope -ed] said all other religions are defective. Catholicism is the one true religion. Followers of other religions are going to burn in hell.

Do you think that might cause problems. If you claim you’re the chosen ones, won’t that piss some people off?

What’s the difference between superstition and religion? NOTHING!!!!

Coming up Leno Ruli from the Catholic Channel is going to set Mojo straight. He’s going to give the other view. I promise to be nice.

Napoleon – Religion is fabulous stuff for keeping the common people quiet.
Marx – Religion is the opium of the people.
Twain – It isn’t the parts of the bible I don’t understand that bother me, it’s the parts I DO understand.
Edison – religion is all bunk.

At 60 years old, that there is an old man with a rule book to keep track and punish people, that’s for kids. Religion is about submission. Got to have faith. Just have to believe. It’s also about obedience. It isn’t your fault. “The Devil made me do it”.

Hemmingway – all thinking men are atheists.

We are being tricked that we should be ashamed of our naked bodies. That sex should be all private. I was put on Earth to have a good time. I believe I was only put on this earth once. I’m not going to sit in my coffin wishing I’d tried something but didn’t because of fear God would smite me.

The rules of life are simple beyond belief. They are mostly in the 10 commandments. You don’t need all this hoo-ha. I’m most familiar with Christianity. The reward is eternal life in Heaven. I don’t want that. I want to win the Winston cup. I want a 3-foot pecker. I want to win the Super Bowl.

Chris in MO
Chris - It isn’t God that screws religion up. It is church. My religion depends on the bible.
Mojo – I used to have a friend that said, It’s not Jesus I’m worried about, it’s his fan club.
Chris – I’ve had a kid go through chemo, and it is just something I’ve felt personally.
Mojo – we’re just monkey’s who shave.
Chris – when those kids bring guns to school, the first on their knees are atheists
Mojo – I’d be tackling.

What kind of God allows all the death, famine, birth defects.  Some people see the goodness, but what about all the bad things.

Break –
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In the studio we have Leno (pronounced lee-no) Ruli from the Catholic Channel.
Mojo – have you been listening for the past 15 mins
Leno – of course I have
Mojo – where do you want to start
Leno – its your show you pick. I think Kathy Griffith winning an Emmy is  the work of the Devil. You know I’m not a big fan of her work anyway.
Mojo – I kind of like her, but she’s one shake away from turning into Joan Rivers.
Leno – Maybe God didn’t hear, the request was on satellite radio.
Mojo – because we have Howard Stern on here.
Leno – No, because we’re only allowed one request per week, and because my show is on before yours, I had made a request to come on Mojo Nixon’s show, so you got screwed.
Mojo – I didn’t grow up catholic. Everyone was Christians, no Hebrews either. You’re on every afternoon on 159 from 4-7 eastern. You talk Catholic news.
Leno – it’s a funny catholic show. We have Ed McMahon.
Mojo – youre the loose and free one, that’s why they let you on my show.
Leno – I’m also the only one who’s up this late
Mojo – I was trying to be entertaining, but I meant everything I said. How come priests can’t marry.
Leno – they can marry, it is just the discipline in the church. The church believes it is easier if you aren’t married.

Mojo – I’d think with the problems with homosexuality and young boys that it would be easier to have a sect that does marry and a sect that doesn’t.
Leno – there is a small small sect that does marry. But the bottom line with pedophilia, most of them are married dudes who are still pedophiles.
Mojo – I think the case can be made that as a young man who is confused about your sexuality. The solution was to become a celibate priest.
Leno – people were repressing their desires and thinking if they’re a priest it would go away, and it just turned worse.
Mojo – weren’t there married priests in the middle ages.
Leno – peter was the first pope, and he was married.
Mojo – did he have one of the hats or a chariot pop-mobile
Leno – no pope-mobile and I don’t know about the hats. Blame the French
Mojo – how come women can’t be priests
Leno – that’s a hard one. To begin with, men don’t listen to women, so that just wouldn’t work. I’m just kidding. The real reason is Jesus was a guy and for whatever reason God when he came into human form because a man and chose as his apostles 12 men.
Mojo – the 12 guys with no jobs
Leno – hey come on, some of them were fishermen. They weren’t all unemployed.
Mojo – that’s why Jesus wasn’t married. Who’d believe him. I’m hanging around this psychic who can turn water into wine….yea I’m sure the wife will believe that.
Leno – he chose men for a reason, and the church disagreed at times, but they can’t change what he started.
Mojo – there’s a lot of smart savvy women. You’re cutting down on your pool. You could have some really good priests if you include women.
Leno – you’re smart. I think women are more inclined to spirituality and religion. This isn’t theologically sound, but I think if you didn’t let us guys be priests we’d have no interest in the church whatsoever.
Mojo – You’ve got some crazy backdoor argument here.
Leno – I said this is mine, not the church’s
Mojo – you’re making some sense here
Leno – I’m upset right now, you’re not swearing at me. This isn’t Mojo Nixon. I have close friends out in Alaska, they wanted to meet you, they were in NYC last week.
Mojo – unfortunately my mother raised me right, but I’m going to ask you another hard one. It’s been about 2000 years, when’s Jesus coming back. How much longer do we have to wait.
Leno – just a little longer
Mojo – Jesus sounded like the apocalypse was right around the corner.
Leno – the first religious people didn’t think they were going to live. It was as the first round of people started dying off that someone thought to start writing this stuff down. Saying between you and me, we might want to write some of this down.
Mojo – in 1666 there were some Russians who castrated themselves and shot their ding-a-lings against a wall from a cannon. Boy were they disappointed in 1667 when Jesus hadn’t come. There’s wives must have been pretty unhappy.
Leno – well some probably
Mojo – speaking of wives. Why is the church against birth control. Look at all the hungry people in the world. Might it be better if they only had 2 kids and not 4.
Leno – Absolutely. It isn’t that the church is against birth control, but that the church loves life.
Mojo – if god loves life, why didn’t he stop the war
Leno – did God start the war? Or people who say they followed God start the war. I’m not trying to point fingers.
Mojo – go ahead. I’m not going to tell anyone on the catholic channel what to say
Leno – speaking of pointing. If anyone listened to John Paul II or pop Benedict. They both said the war was a bad thing. God is pro-life. It is the followers, like me, who don’t follow god’s will that screw things up.
Mojo – why doesn’t the church accept homosexuals
Leno – what do you mean. How doesn’t the church accept them?
Mojo – you hear a lot of church guys, a lot of evangelical Christians ranting about the demons of homosexuality.
Leno – as far as church teaching
Mojo – have you met the current pope. Have you heard my joke? Has the pope ever called you.
Leno – I’ve met both. I heard the joke, was a good one.
Mojo – does the pope or head in the US have a hotline?
Leno – they do, but they won’t give me the number
Mojo – those big cardinals have little hats. Is there something between a cardinal and pope who has a big hat.

Leno – no
Mojo – I dislike people using religion to promote hate and fear.
Leno – if I may say. There are a few straw arguments and then just knocked them over. God isn’t some old man with a book. That’s not what we believe.
Mojo – I know, but people envision it in their head. That’s the vision in your head as a kid
Leno – yes he’s Santa Claus. But that’s not really what we believe in. It isn’t a man in the sky with a rulebook. All the quotes in the world are fine. Intellectually, it isn’t right to say all the smart people in the world aren’t followers of religion. Even Einstein believed there was something.
Mojo – I know, but that wasn’t religion
Leno – yes, that’s where we get involved. People say the churches are filled with jerk hypocrites, but if I try to find another church it too will be filled with the same people.
Mojo – have you ever had psychedelic mushrooms Leno?
Leno – yes I have
Mojo – see that explains how to get close to God. You want to see god, eat mushrooms
Leno – I disagree
Mojo – you disagree? I’m a non believer, I see the joy and the pain. I see it as a wash. What should I do to get closer to god.
Leno – intellectually I’d prefer you read a book like Mere Christianity by CS Lewis. If intellectually you can’t get closer then it is a wash.
Mojo - I know CS Lewis. He was friends with Tolkien. We’re out of time, but when I come to NYC I’ll come on your show and get you fired.
I have a song from John Fogerty from CCR
I Can’t take it no more
Carbonite ad

Cindy Lee Berryhill off her new album. Cindyleeberryhill.com We use to be romantically linked way back before Mojo was  a married man.

Next week I’m in NYC in the studio and my special guest will be Gibby Haynes from Butthole surfers.

Mike from ??
Mike – I’m a skeptic. Some guy back in BC days. I think someone came up with a story and made stuff up.
Mojo  - they were trying to explain light and science so they came up with this stuff.
Mike – By Moses, there were too many rules to follow, so they tried to simplify.
Mojo – I believe that. Some poll says that 3 out of 4 people walking around believe in God or believe in something.
Mike – what about miracles.
Mojo – A Miracle is nothing but Magic or superstition. When people come back to life it is as mummies in a George A Romero movie. It isn’t a good thing.
Mike – someone told me they had a seed planted in them.
Mojo – back in the bible days Jesus and god was happening all the time. Doesn’t seem like it is happening now. There are all sorts of new names. Now there are brights who are smart enough to see through the bullshit.

Al  in MI
Al – I agree on a whole bunch of stuff and love hearing you rag on Bush. If you don’t believe there’s a god, how do you think we got here.
Mojo – I don’t know. I think you’ve hit on something. That’s what religion is trying to do. It is trying to figure out how we got here. Why it works. People want to believe in God because it makes us special. If we’re just random events then we aren’t special. When I’m dead, I don’t want to be wishing I’d done things. I want to be worn out having done everything I wanted to do.

Tom in OH
Tom – did that priest say he’d had mushrooms?
Mojo – yes
Tom – I think I like that guy
Mojo – I don’t think he’s a priest. He’s just a guy, but he said he met both popes. He even got my joke
Tom- people are only religious because its shoved into their heads as kids. It’s like people who are brought up racists.
Mojo – Everyone gets it shoved into them as a kid. As you hit 19-20 you see there are these other religions.
Tom – Mormons believe even after you die you can work your way up to heaven.
Mojo – they also think you have to wear special underwear. Mormons are interesting Biblical stuff was thousands of years ago. Now we have a religion that was just made up 150 years ago. Joseph Smith in Elmira NY had a vision with seeing stones. Wrote down a book with Moronii in it. He put the warts into the religion.

Break –
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Well Gods time is up. I gave him a week, and I’m looking at CNN and there don’t seem to be any miracles out there.

Want to learn more about this. I suggest a site called positive atheism. Positiveatheism.com
Atheists have a bad name that they’re against religion. They aren’t against religion. They just don’t believe in it. Also disinfo.com.

Delbert in ID
Delbert – everyone has their own beliefs. I believe in God, you can believe in whatever you want to .
Mojo – can you prove it
Delbert – I’m a Mormon, I can’t prove it, but I believe
Mojo – You believe because you believe. There’s no way to prove.
Delbert – I know.
Mojo – what if you’re wrong. What if the Christian scientists are right.
Delbert – well I guess I go to hell. If he’s there, he’s there
Mojo – you believe, and I hope that makes you feel better.

Nathan in CO
Mojo – sorry for the wait I do tend to go on.
Nathan – (has kids yelling in the background) I was curious, what made you stop believing if you ever believed.

Mojo – I think deep down inside, I never did. I gave a sermon when I was 12. I never felt the spirit. I love gospel music as music, but I’ve never believed. It always seemed a sham.
Nathan – what happens when we die.
Mojo – I don’t think there’s anything else. When we die, we’re done. That consciousness is done. That’s part of evolution. You’ve created some little you’s. we’re gone to make room for the new people. Heaven might be really full. If what Jerry Fallwell says is true, I’m going to hell, but all my friends will be there too.
God prove to me you exist. I’ll give you an extra week to do it. End the war in Iraq.

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